Holocaust News Service-Miami
Today, in the Norman Podhoretz Federal Court building in Miami, Schlomo Phulloshitiz IV and others filed a class action lawsuit for an undisclosed amount of money to be paid for their ongoing Holocaust™ Survivor Descendants Memory.
Phulloshitz said that he and his fellow claimants have been dreaming up possible WW II scenarios that may or may not have happened to their great-grandparents, like Schlomo's great-grandfather, Schlomo Phulloshitz Sr. and those repressed "memories" are making their lives a living hell.
Said Phulloshitz: "These imaginative scenarios which I( and others) have cultivated extensively have so debilitated my being that I have not been able to do a day of work ever in my entire life." He added "I have been under the care of a psychiatrist, Dr. Kwackberg. Kwackberg said that to help alleviate these symptoms, I should avoid all work, especially the physical kind and spend as much time, during the day, enjoying the sun and fun of local beaches and at night, having more fun, hitting the trendy hot spots of the Miami South Beach night club scene. Of course, this is part of my doctor mandated cure and in no way should be construed as anything else", said Phulloshitz.
"This I have done religiously, but it has not been enough to take away the self-inflicted pain of those repressed Holocaust™ Survivor Descendants memories, so i and others, have filed suit in federal court to seek redress in monetary form."
"Successfully winning that lawsuit will go a long way to helping me recover from this dreaded malady."
Phulloshitz said that having inherited vast sums of Holocaust™ reparation payments from his father helped him to avoid work, so he could concentrate on his cure, but was not enough to spend his life in the style mandated by his psychiatrist.
This reporter could not but helped to be moved by the these tales of woe affecting Schlomo and in fact, during this interview, started suffering some of the same symptoms suggested by Schlomo, so much so that I have decided to seek the care of Dr. Kwackberg.
Reporting--for now--for the Holocaust News Service, this is Ima Golddigger from Miami.
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