Wednesday, June 2, 2010

"Honest Officer, I didn't Rape and Kill that Woman!"

"Excuse me sir, but I'm investigating what appears to be a very violent murder and rape of this young woman that's laying on the grass and was wondering if you knew anything about it?"

"What the hell you asking me for, I'm innocent!"

"Uh, sir, your hands are covered in blood and you're holding what appears to be a very sharp and bloody knife and when I approached the scene, you were in the act of pulling up your pants."

"See, there you go, jumping to conclusions. The woman attacked me, me, for Christ's sake and I just defended myself. The knife I'm holding I took from her when she tried to stab me."

"Tried to stab you?"

"Yes, I was walking along, minding my own business when this crazy wench jumps out of nowhere, grabs me and starts pulling me to those bushes. It was only thru the grace of my G-d that I was able to ..."

"You expect me to believe she was dragging you? She must be around 5 1/2 foot tall and weigh no more than 120 pounds and you're about 6' 2" tall and must weigh at least 250 pounds and you're trying to tell me she was dragging you?"

"Yes, yes yes! How many times must I tell you I'm the VICTIM and completely innocent of anything and everything!"

"Let's see that knife... Hmm, aren't those initials on the knife the same as your initials?"

"Dammit, there you go again, blaming me, the innocent victim. How in the hell do you know those initials don't belong to that crazed, psychotic bitch lying on the ground. And yes, slitting her throat was a bit over the top, but I'm telling you, it was the only way to save me from a fate worse than death. I'm the victim here, do you hear me, the VICTIM!"

"What about the rape, did you commit that?"

"Alright, this has gone on long enough. What's your badge number bub? Get on your radio and call your commander, Chief Barry, he'll straighten your sorry ass out!"

"Uhh, sorry sir, like you said, you were only defending yourself. You're free to go and have a nice day! Sorry to have troubled you."


"Oh, sorry sir. My report will explicitly state that you were the victim of a savage and unprovoked attack by that woman, which will absolve you of all suspicions and make you eligible for monetary compensation from our Victim's Fund. Again, my most sincere apologies, sir!"

Just another beautiful day in ZIONAZILAND, where only the GOY have to answer for crimes.


Noor al Haqiqa said...

Brilliant. Just brilliant. Thanks again, you have an amazing twist to your thinking....

Greg Bacon said...

At times like these, with the ZIONAZIS running and ruining everything, a little satire helps.

Timster said...

I don't believe a word of his story. I think he raped and killed the gal

veritas6464 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
vlad said...

Very funny, but not as funny as watching heavily armed israeli commandos getting thrown overboard by 60 year old women wearing adult diapers.....LMFAO

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